What a whirlwind few days we have had. We woke early Thursday morning, January 5, to learn that we had cleared Embassy and were ready to travel. I can’t explain the absolute relief that washed over me. Part of the adoption journey involves waiting, that is a given. But there are also a lot of unknowns that can either cause you to get caught up in the emotion over it….or to submit it to Lord, sometimes second by second. It involves trusting that a young African girl who lives hours from the capital, can be found and will endure a long, bumpy, uncomfortable journey…to again tell her story and say goodbye to the son she birthed and raised for 19 months. It is believing that God is always at work on our behalf, for the purpose of His Glory, even when what is going on around you, seems like the forces of evil are winning.

Is it really winning when a young girl has to relinquish her child because she has no way to provide for him? Can we rejoice over this child for whom we have prayed is coming home, when it means, the arms of another will never again hold her son? Can we do this? Can unspeakable joy and the deepest heartache exist at the same time?

So, those were the thoughts and emotions swimming in my heart and head at 5:00 am, as I’m standing in my bathroom, and read those precious words.

YOU ARE CLEARED.

My heart was tender and broken most of the day towards this young woman, who I knew was probably seeing her child for the last time. The ache I felt for her was almost painful because I imagined what it would feel like to release my children to the love and care of people I had never met nor seen. Not for a moment or a day, but forever.

And, I was broken.
In the midst of learning tha our Embassy appointment meant leaving four days later and juggling schedules, and finishing things at work, and getting the final touches done on adding a toddler to our home, and spending time with the kids, I thought of this young woman and just hurt for her.  I needed to grieve for her and with her at the fallen world we live in and wrestle with how God will be glorified when there are 147 Million more just like him.

And then….

Later in the day we received pictures of that moment. Obsi with his birth mom on that last day.
And I was struck by how beautiful she looked and how AT PEACE she looked. With a smile on her face, holding him, enjoying that time, I was again overwhelmed with the knowledge that MY God redeems, He takes that which is broken and tenderly makes it new. He alone brings beauty out of the ashes and I saw the proof on my computer. In her eyes, she can now rest, knowing she loved that boy enough to put his needs before her own. I may never know all the details of her story or her reasons, but I do know this….she sacrifically loved her son.

And now it is our turn. It is Jason, Kelly, Parker, Emery and Bradley’s turn to take the reigns from her and follow her example to love him. He is a Stewart, whether he likes it or not, whether he looks like us or not, we will love him, for the rest of his days. We will now walk the path of healing for a scared, little soul. Our journey is not at the end , but rather, we are only beginning….and I can not wait to see Judson’s redemption story…..

Sweet First Mom,
I may never meet you except in the mannerisms or eyes of our son, but I can promise you this, Judson Obsi will be loved. I will hold him tight, I will wipe his tears, I will give him boundaries, speak encouragement to him, help him dream big, and advocate for him. His daddy will show him how to be a godly man, a leader and a gentleman. His sisters will stand up for him, take care of him, and protect him. His brother will play with him, teach him about cars and trucks, and let’s be honest, tackle him. His grandparents are amazing and will give him pretty much whatever he wants. His aunts and uncles will always let him vent about his parents. His cousins will laugh with him and always play with him. His church will open their heart to him and live out a faith in Christ that is real and passionate.

I promise to pray for you and to honor you. I know God has an amazing plan for you..seek Him. He will heal your heart and He is trustworthy. You are forever apart of our life and you can rest in the knowledge that your son has found a home that wants to see him UNLEASHED.

Be at peace….

On October 31, we passed court. It was really non eventful. We sat in a room with other CCI families and answered a few questions. The one that stands out is when she asked, “Do you understand the adoption is permanent and cannot be revoked?” The she told us specifically that Obsi is ours.

Just like that we are a Party of Six.

Wow.

The girls stayed at the Guest House with some older kids and had a blast helping care for one of the babies. They also introduced the IPad to their new African friends. Evidently, Angry Birds is a universal language! They also had their hair braided. Love watching them let some things go. Love that they see with a different lens. Love watching them be givers of self.

That afternoon, we ventured on a tour of Addis with another family and their soon to be adopted 8 and 10 year old! It was really fun. We went to the market and Emery had her first experience of what it means to be a blonde kid in Africa. There were a group of children who got out of school and were passing by. They were very curious about her and a few minutes later, I noticed Emery getting a little emotional. When I pulled her aside to check on her, she informed me of how some of the kids had pinched her, kicked at her and poked her….bless her. I felt just awful, but knew these kids were not being mean, they just wanted to touch her. We were able to purchase some things from the market for the kids to take to their classmates and I may have done a little bit of Christmas shopping.

We later went up to Entoto Mountain which looks over the city. It was rugged. We saw this huge ant like parade, which we later learned these were ants with pinchers! Poor Em, again, was the victim of their claws and was such a trooper as we are literally ripping her shirt off to see what in the world was biting her!

It was a wonderful life changing day.

Travel to Ethiopia is long, but so very worth it. Jason and I knew pretty early on that we wanted to take Parker with us. Part of our plan as parents is to expose them frequently and early to the world outside of Tennessee.  We really thought through if she was ready to see poverty in a tangible way and live outside of her comfort zone for a week. As we got closer, we felt both girls were ready and wanted them to have this experience together. Together, they can have this amazing memory, but also can process it with each other in a way that they can’t with us. Needless to say….lots of excitement in our house in the weeks prior.  Our prayer has been that God would use all that they saw and experienced to cause a very real shift in their hearts and minds about living an obedient life and the desperate need we all have for Jesus.

We left Nashville on Friday, October 28 and headed to Washington D.C. We stayed overnight and flew out on Saturday.  13.5 hours later and we are there! Ethiopia is not a quick trip, but all in all, we had a great flight.  The girls did great!  They watched movies, read and slept (very little.) Jason sat next to an Ethiopian woman named Gigi and she walked with us through baggage claim and customs. She and her husband run an orphanage 100 miles outside of Addis Ababa. She was invaluable and was ready to help us in any way.

We got to our Guest House and crashed for a while.

Then we headed out to meet Obsi.

We were nervous and excited,  realizing there is no turning back. This was the moment I hadprayed for and thought about for months.  The nanny went to get him up from his nap….not good. He came in wearing clothes we had sent months earlier that looked like they had never been worn. His 18 month clothes were big on our 2 year old. The sweet nanny handed him to me and he was terrified.

He just cried and cried and cried. I carried him outside and he just couldnt stop. He then kinda sorta threw up…awesome. It is just heartbreaking. He began to calm down when the Nanny picked him back up. We played and played and played…with all the other kids. We just kept giving Obsi suckers, kicking a soccer ball and he got to a point that he would only whimper when he looked at us. He even cried when the girls tried to hold him. Our whiteness seriously scares him.  They call these people (us) he has never met, Mommy and Daddy. He is wise enough to recognize that changes are coming. Jason said to me at one point, “He is guarding his heart, which is a good thing.”

The good things I saw were how attached he is to the Nanny and the older boys who are at the Transition House. Obsi seeks them out and their presence comforts him. They were gentle and patient with him. They did not like seeing him cry and you could tell that they just wanted to scoop him up and help him feel better. That warms this mommy’s heart. I have NO doubt we will become security and stability for him…it just will take longer than fifteen minutes.

We loved playing with the kids. Parker has been saving her kids meal toys for a long time.  For months, she has put them in a bucket at our house because she wanted to give them to the kids at the orphanage.  When we got there, they began to hand them out.  You would have thought we were giving a shopping spree at Toys R Us!!  They loved these small token gifts. Some would take them and run, others would share with their buddies. So many of the kids were eager to be held,  and most were ready to play and to interact. It was truly breathtaking to watch our girls give of themselves.

October 30…the day we met our fourth child, Judson Obsi, age 2 years 4 months.

We are sitting in Dulles about to take off for Africa. I am so amazed to be at this pont and so incredibly blessed to have Parker and Emery with us for the journey! I wanted to put on here a few specific ways you can pray for our family.

Bradley is manning the fort: please pray for him as his family is gone and for our parents who get to love on him.

Court: Pray all documents are in order and we pass our first time.

Health: Pray we all stay healthy, Parker will eat, and Emery does not catch pnuemonia!

Our new boy: Pray that he knows we are his family and quickly adjusts to these strange new people that just want to love on him. If not, pray he is easily bribed with candy!

We are excited and ready….remember the Stewarts this week!

I have so much to share about our adoption…and I will, but I wanted to share about some ideas I have had running in my mind as we set our sights on the busiest time of the year. Our goal is to keep things simple (right) and be as organized and strategic as possible to insure that we feel the least amount of stress…at least that is the plan!

One source of anxiety each year is our Christmas cards…I don’t know why but I feel like I agonize over this annual card that most people look at, read and toss. But, I also know this is the way we use to chronicle another year and really capture the past year! Last year, I used Shutterfly and  LOVED them. They have soo many options and the ability to customize many cards to your desire. The process was simple and easy and they arrived very quickly. Here is the inside of our card from 2010:

They have some great Christmas cards to choose from that I love or some Holiday Cards that are more fun and funky!

I think there are some great calendars and gift items on Shutterfly as well!

We will be using Shutterfly again this year and I am so excited to be able to share 3 promo codes for 25 FREE cards from Shutterfly!! What a blessing to be able to mark your Christmas cards off your list AND for FREE!!

Here is how you can enter to win 1 of 3 Promo codes”

1. Leave a comment telling me how you keep the holidays simple.
2. Tweet about the giveaway with a link to this post and leave a comment saying you did so.
3. Post the link to the giveaway on your Facebook page and leave a comment that you did so.

I will choose the 3 winners on Friday, October 28!!

Are you a blogger? Want a chance at 25 free cards this holiday season? Register here: http://goo.gl/DDw7Q

Blessings!!

Our girl is 8.

I am so overwhelmed by this fact.

She is such a joy in a cute dimpled little body. I am so proud of her and how she loves on and serves those around her, especially those younger than her. Emery loves her some babies. She wants to be a teacher one day and a rock star. And strangely, I have no doubt she could be either, neither or both!

In her seventh year, I feel like I have gotten to know her more. I’ve known her since she took her first breath, but this year I feel like I understand her more. I have learned that Emery loves change and needs new adventures. She is our modern girl with her ipod touch, who still loves to play with her dolls.  She loves to laugh, can make friends easily, goes with the flow, but is fierce to get her way at times, she is super smart, COMPETITIVE, outgoing, yet shy, and pretty much cries every Wednesday night…sobs actually, over the most random things. I call it her midweek tired cry.

She is dynamic and I have no doubt that what she puts her mind too, she will accomplish. I not only love this sweet, sassy thing….I like her a lot too!

Emery, you are already a force to be reckoned with and I am so thankful that God ordained you to be ours to love and guide.  I am so proud at how you have taken on new situations this year and EMBRACED them. I love to see your confidence growing in yourself and that you are growing comfortable in who God created you to be. I love that you are tender to others and yet can be so fierce in what you believe in (even when it is flat out wrong!).  I love watching you reading the Word and gaining understanding of who God is and His purpose for you. I have no doubt that He has an amazing journey for you that will not be predictable or ordinary. He created you for more and I have no qualms claiming big things for you for HIS GLORY. I am simply crazy about you my sweet unexpected surprise. Be bold, be reckless in your pursuit of JESUS….I can’t wait to watch you grow…

We have seen his face…..

And we know his Ethiopian name…..

And we are filled with joy!

I stole this from Jason’s blog because I wanted to keep a record or it and because it gets to the heart of our adoption.

Add star

Check out this giveaway for a cool Ugandan Magazine Necklace!! These are great Christmas gifts!

http://networkedblogs.com/b9k8O

Last week, Bradley had a little Thanksgiving program and it was just precious! We had such a great Thanksgiving. I am so thankful for our time in Knoxville, visiting

Jason’s family. It was  a much needed getaway and precious time with our family.

Here is Bradley before singing Turkey songs….

Seriously, how cute are those turkey leg hats?  I had a moment when I realized there will be a day when construction paper hats will not be worn by my kids and it made me so sad.

Our little turkey….

He is so cute..we heard his sweet songs all weekend.

We had a sweet time hanging with Bradley.

Poppy got to come watch too!

Me and my sweet boy!